Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Mance Rayder / Petyr "Littlefinger" Baelish / Theon Greyjoy

Mance Rayder

Why Marry? Because if you can't marry the King on the Iron Throne, you might as well marry the King Beyond the Wall. Mance is a lover of music and entertainment and seems to treat his women (relatively) well.

Why F***? Because he's got some wildling in him. He's not a bad-looking fellow and the wildlings are known for being fearless in the sack.

Why Kill? Because Mance is a turncoat; he deserted his brothers of the Night's Watch and now plans to attack them. You can't trust him.

Petyr "Littlefinger" Baelish

Why Marry? Because as we've mentioned before, Littlefinger has pulled himself up by his bootstraps to become one of the most powerful players in King's Landing. He's going places, and you could be the one that goes with him.

Why F***? Because he started learning the ways of women at a young age from the Tully girls, so he's had plenty of time to practice.

Why Kill? Because Littlefinger is a sneaky little bugger. He will likely stop at nothing to gain more power, and you should probably get rid of him before he gets rid of you.

Theon Greyjoy

Why Marry? Because Theon is ambitious and clever. All he wants is for someone to love and believe in him, and if you're that someone, there's probably little he wouldn't do for you.

Why F***? Because he's tall, dark, and handsome. Plus he's been around the block a few times.

Why Kill? Because he is both arrogant and ruthless: a dangerous combination.

Our Picks

Cedar: Marry Mance, F*** Theon, Kill Littlefinger
Erin: Marry Mance, F*** Theon, Kill Littlefinger
Jamie: Marry Mance, F*** Theon, Kill Littlefinger


  1. M Mance, because I wouldn't marry either of the other two. EVER.
    F Theon...I suppose, though he probably caught something nasty from Ros.
    K Baelish, because that dude's been firing short one piston since Catelyn married Ned. Time to put him out of his misery before he gets to Sansa.

  2. M: Mance, F: Littlefinger, K: Theon
    Mance is pretty damn cool. If he won over the free folk, he is probably quite charming.
    Theon wishes he were Littlefinger; he just makes terrible choices all the time. He will screw up and screw you over. At least if you got on Littlefinger's good side, he might not try to take you out immediately. But if you're married to Mance, he probably won't even care about you, so whatever.